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Wink, wink. Nudge, nudge.

11/28/2011

Belle

I confess, before going to spin class I bought a "Skin Firming" lotion. Sadly, it is not called Cellulite Be Gone. Even more sad is that it has done nothing more than leave me with really greasy legs.

Two weeks ago I decided it was time to face reality and examine the squeezable & soft body that has replaced my once very lean and muscular body. I was trying to convince myself that things really are not that bad when the back side of my right thigh winked a coy “Hi! My name is cellulite! Let’s go eat chocolate!” at me.

 That’s right. My thigh cellulite winked at me. Don’t pretend you don’t know what I mean, either. Y’all have seen when that little cellulite indentation takes on a life of its own one morning, winking at you and saying in a VERY annoying tone “How YOU doin’?” And then you die a little.

That wink was the final straw. The mini muffin top was bad enough, but now winking legs? Today I launched full-out war on everything south of my equator and attended…. my first spin class.

I have always been a fan of working out. I love lifting weights, yoga*, biking and walking outside but I just cannot get into group fitness classes. The idea of spending 60 plus minutes in a room packed with sweaty people bouncing and bumping all over the place really grosses me out. Spinning is just as freaky. You want me to put my rump on a tiny little seat where COUNTLESS other rumps have huffed, puffed and left behind butt sweat? No thank you, I’ll stick with my old-fashioned bike.

The problem with walking and biking outdoors is winter in Kentucky. Here we get cold rain, sleet, ice and a smattering of actual snow. When we do get snow (which I love) it is usually the wet heavy kind and it is always accompanied by humidity. While walking and riding a bike in this kind of weather is possible, it is far from enjoyable and torturing myself in gross weather conditions is not really in line with the whole “I need to take care of my body so it can make a baby before the lupus monster gets me” lifestyle I’m trying to focus on.

Faced with winking cellulite and gross weather, I decided to suck it up and plop my bum on a communal bike seat (gag). I even did this without first disinfecting it, although I did consider if I could cover the seat with a towel and still manage to not fall off the stationary bike (a legitimate concern after reading this).

Luckily this morning’s class was quite small, just a handful of people, none of whom were a size 0 with C cups. The instructor helped me adjust the bike for my height and did not laugh or say “Dang, woman, look at those winking thighs!”

During the class the lights are turned out and black lights and a few Christmas lights turned on. I was relieved to learn this as I REALLY was not looking forward to watching as I huffed along on a stationary bike. The music was upbeat and helped to keep my mind off the fact that I was trying to peddle away from cellulite.

Dare I say it; I actually enjoyed the class and am looking forward to going again on Wednesday morning and pushing myself harder. I kept myself at a more moderate pace this time, as I didn’t want to pass out, vomit, fall or a combination of all three!

I am also excited as spinning is something I can do during infertility treatments and IVF cycles. Thanks to my nice cysty ovaries, I’m always at high risk of ovarian torsion while doing stims. My doctor does not want me running, jumping or doing any excessive bending. Spinning, though, is nothing more than pumping my legs in a seated or standing position. Seems ovary-safe to me!

How about y’all? Do you take spin classes? What is your preferred method of cardio during an IVF cycle?

* Going to a yoga class was a pretty big step for me, although I NEVER use the communal mats. Have you smelled those things? One word – feet. I have grown to love yoga class, though, and very rarely am I just horrified by the thought of sweaty people bending in unnatural positions all around me, except of course, when someone lets a bodily function fly, but that is another blog post all together.

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17 Comments

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  1. November 28, 2011

    Ha ha! Winking thighs! I’ve definitely been adding some chunk lately, too. I haven’t done IVF so don’t have any recommendations, but spinning seems like a great option.

  2. November 28, 2011

    I also have no recommendations for cardio during IVF, but I do love spin! It’s so frustrating at my gym though…you MUST call EXACTLY 24 hours in advance- they won’t let you sign up early and they are full in 5 minutes. No joke. Takes more effort to sign up for the class than the actual class itself!

    It also kills my whole….area…(ouch) so I had to buy my own seat cover, which also helps with the germs so it was a good investment, I think.

    Glad you liked it!

    • November 29, 2011

      That really stinks about your spin class and I MUST look for one of these seat covers. My muscles don’t hurt today but BOY do my bum bones hurt!

  3. November 28, 2011

    Black lights during spinning? That sounds pretty awesome! I’ve been inspired to hit my elliptical tonight. 🙂

  4. Sarah L #
    November 28, 2011

    During my first IVF cycle I was strictly forbidden to exercise during the two week wait. When I asked about exercise, my RE’s exact words were “the most I want you doing is walking to your car”. I listened to her and the cycle failed anyway. Grrr. Still trying to lose those five pounds. I’m going to ask again as I move into my next cycle of meds in December. I’m trying to understand what the actual issue is so that maybe I can find a way to get some exercise in during this next cycle. If they’re just concerned about dehydration, I can handle that. If they don’t want heartrate going up over normal day to day ranges, that’s a different issue. I’ll keep you posted.

    If you can spin, you should also be able to use the elliptical trainer and the treadmill – more leg pumping. Non-bendy weight-lifting would also probably be fine. The torture machine also known as the stair master would also probably be allowed.

    Good luck!

  5. November 28, 2011

    I used to have a really solid gym habit (re: used to) and spin helped me lose 40 lbs. I have PCOS too, so you know how freaking hard that is. I really, really enjoyed it. I’m sure if I got myself together and actually went back, I would like it again. No choreography necessary and you can go at your own pace = ideal cardio for me. Way to go on getting through your first class! Don’t be surprised if your butt is sore – it goes away after a few classes.

    • November 29, 2011

      The lack of choreography is a MAJOR selling point for me, too!

  6. November 29, 2011

    I’m imagining a giant eye on your leg with big eyelashes swooshing a big wink, a la Betty Boop. But actually I’m not sure what you mean by winking. I have lots of cellulite but I haven’t noticed my legs winking at me.

    Some people are really grossed out by cramming next to a bunch of other sweating people but I actually like it. I used to take hot yoga where we were literally packed in, mats touching one another, people dripping on each other, whatever, it happens, then you take a shower. I might have felt differently before I moved to NYC where basically stepping outside the apartment means I’m contaminated with filth. So what’s a sweaty gym when I’ve been crowded in a subway car touching people on every side of me? Talk about YUCK!!

  7. November 29, 2011

    You are right, NEVER use the communal yoga mats! I LOVE yoga, but I use my own mat, which I clean with a lavendar/ tea tree oil solution. Yoga is good exercise I can do during cycles and it relaxes me too. The lights are also off so people can’t see you too well, which is a plus. I hope you find ways to keep fit during your cycle. Good luck!

  8. November 29, 2011

    Glad you had success! I think every exercise class should have the lights out, as what stresses me out so much is people staring at me. (Probably because they can sense, correctly, that I will do something stupid in the class.) But then I would be in even more danger of tripping or falling over things or people I can’t see.

    So spin on, friend 🙂

  9. November 29, 2011

    Defffffinitely yoga! Personally I would avoid too many twisty poses which you would probably know to avoid anyway because of your torsiony ovaries, and once you have the embryo/s transferred avoid too much squatting (encourages the downward flow of energy). And also avoid shoulder massages btw – apparently there’s an acupuncture point on the shoulders (around the traps I think) that can cause miscarriage- eek!

    Try and get to a restorative yoga class too, and do poses like supta baddha konasana and legs up the wall pose. Sooo relaxing. I really should write a post about this – been meaning to for ages.

    I used to take my own mat, now I can;t be bothered and just lie down on the dirty old studio ones! Dirty me.

    • November 29, 2011

      You SHOULD write a post on fertility friendly poses. I would love to read what you know! And yes, legs up the wall pose is one of my favorites. I had NO IDEA about squatting. Thanks for the info.

  10. November 29, 2011

    I would be very impressed if you go spinning during stims. I couldn’t (or maybe didn’t want to) do anything more than walking. It felt enough for me. After transfer there should only be gentle exercise they told me. I agree on yoga it’s also relaxing at the same time.

    • November 29, 2011

      I don’t necessarily want to do anything during stims so much as I HAVE to do something. I rely heavily on exercise as a way to manage my anxiety with out medication. Must keep moving to get those endorphins flowing! Post transfer I think I’ll stick with evening walks and restorative yoga for sure though.

  11. November 30, 2011

    So do you have to wear the special shorts in these classes? I’ve been thinking of checking one out but I’m allergic to (looking at myself in) lycra. 🙂

    • November 30, 2011

      Thank GAWD no! I am also allergic to looking at myself in lycra. In fact, I believe everyone should be. I don’t care how thin you are, no one wants to see all that business!

  12. JM #
    December 1, 2011

    I’d still be pretty nervous to spin during an IVF cycle… You use your core quite a bit when standing up and sitting down during some of the moves they do, which would just make me nervous. I dunno… I’m glad you like it though! I enjoyed the classes when I used to go.

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