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Completely Overwhelmed



I am blown away by all the sweet comments from my earlier post. I feel so loved and supported, even though I still have not had an In Real Life hug. Thank you all so much. You have no idea how calm your comments have kept me.

Don’t judge, but I carried that used pee stick everywhere with me today. I sat it on my desk where I could see it, but people stopping by my office could not. When I went out on assignment I slipped it into my camera bag. When I went to run errands I had it in my purse. I felt better knowing it was there and any time I had a moment of doubt, I would sneak a peek at the two lovely lines.

I have been trying to keep myself busy and in a positive head space tonight. After work I went to the dreaded Walmart and bought a box of digital HPTs (5 tests for under $20 bucks!) and another box of First Response HPTs. I have resisted taking one tonight as I know it is still really early and I probably need my most potent, first thing in the morning pee.

I took a nice slow four mile walk in the arboretum and watched parents play with their kids and silently talked to Pip, telling him how I promise to take him outside every day. It was good to stretch my legs, albeit a far cry from my usual calorie burning power walk. If Pip stays, I am determined to walk every single day to keep us both healthy.

Once home I did some dishes, made a single serving microwave cake (Holy Cow ladies, this is every hormonal woman’s dream! I’ll post the recipe tomorrow night, promise!) and had some left over homemade Thai food with brown rice, tofu and lots of veggies. I decided my sweet cats needed a special dinner to mark the good news so I dished up some extra stinky cat food and garnished it with kibble pieces. The meal was much enjoyed and now I have four sacked out kitties with full bellies.

Right now I’m watching back-to-back episodes of Big Bang Theory and reading about how an embryo grows week by week. I have not let myself really look at this stuff before and it is absolutely amazing. I find this all a lot less scary when I look at it from a scientific standpoint and break things down 7 days at a time.

Just two more sleeps till test day.



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  1. Bethany #
    April 24, 2012

    I totally understand about carrying the “proof” around 🙂 I still carry a picture on my phone of my first BFP. There is a link that tells you day by day what happens on a 3 day and 5 day transfer. I wasn’t sure if you had it or not, so I attached it! Thinking of you and Pip…

    • April 25, 2012

      I have this page printed on and on my fridge! It has kept tears at bay numerous times 🙂

  2. Jen #
    April 24, 2012

    Whoah! How did I miss your BFP post???

    CONGRATULATIONS! This is so wonderful and I’m so happy for you.

    Don’t feel silly about carrying around the pee stick. I’d probably frame it if it were me. 🙂

  3. April 24, 2012

    I actually had MUCH darker BFPs in the afternoon and evening than in the morning, and Ive been hearing the same thing from my cycle buddies. Go ahead and pee!

    • April 25, 2012

      I actually had darker lines with my second morning pee today. I’ll take it 🙂

  4. April 24, 2012

    Holy toledo batman I missed your BFP Post!!!! Thatta girl . Just remember I had a weird post beta pee on a stick that got fainter… So a line is a line is a line. Blood tests are what count so don’t have a panic attack if it gets fainter. You and pip rock. Xxx

    • April 25, 2012

      I read this comment right after getting a negative digital and a positive First Response. It kept me from flying off the hook. Thank you!

  5. April 24, 2012

    No judgement here! My husband found me on many occasion holding my several pee sticks, comparing each day and smiling to myself. And at 13 weeks I still have them all!! Also, if you have an iPhone the what to expect app is so awesome, it gives you weekly info as well as daily info and tells you how big baby is and what he/she is doing.

    • April 25, 2012

      I have heard about the App, but think I’m not quite ready to download anything. It seems risky enough blogging about this and looking at pregnancy development Web sites! Maybe in a few more weeks….

  6. April 25, 2012

    Can’t wait to hear about that cake recipe. Glad you had a great day and I would be carrying that pee stick around too! I would probably even frame it!!

  7. Anna #
    April 25, 2012

    Having positive tests after Ivf never seem real! I remember I tested twice a day for the first 20 days! I kept those sticks lined up and I would often be found just staring at them! Now I am often found staring at my beautiful 6 month old twins! Enjoy the calmness because that’s coming from your lovely little pip xxx

    • April 25, 2012

      Oh that is so good to hear! Thanks for the encouragement!

  8. April 25, 2012

    I stopped by on Saturday – saw your “Count” post …. but I didn’t get the chance to comment (such is my life) … so – you’ve had some big news since I was here – WOW!!! I’m hoping that tomorrow brings you a darker line!!!

    I know with each of my pregnancies after infertility …. I was crazy – poas every chance I got. Compairing and contrasting………. it’s amazing the feeling of knowing you are pregnant – your little tiny secret only you really know about … so fun. You get to decide how to tell people, how to surprise your husband… tell your family… it’s amazing…

    STICK PIP STICK! Give Momma some GREAT numbers!

    Hopping over from ICLW (#86)

    • April 25, 2012

      Thanks for stopping by Annissa! There was no surprising folks b/c I am a TERRIBLE SECRET KEEPER! Plus, everyone in our lives knows we were doing an IVF cycle. It was easier than being sneaky and a lot less stressful for me. I am very open with people reminding them we have a LONT climb ahead of us and that we are no where near naming the baby 🙂

  9. April 25, 2012

    My line of pregnancy tests has been sitting on my bathroom counter since my first BFP on March 20th! I still get belly tickles looking at them several times a day, and remembering the emotions I felt seeing the first positive. Enjoy.every.second. YAY!

  10. April 25, 2012

    I would totally carry that stick around with me too! I love it! Come on Pip, show us more that you are there!

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