50% of my day is spent with this shit-eating grin on my face because of Pip’s presence.
The other half is spent in an insane tizzy of Google searching, blog reading, beta comparing madness. I had so hoped that when my BFP came I could stop these obsessive tendencies, but it seems to just have increased it. This afternoon I had this whirl of doubt because, gasp, I’m feeling fine.
Off I went to the bathroom to POAS with highly diluted urine (I drank a can of La Croix like 60 minutes ago). Mid-stream it occurred to me that I am doing nothing but setting myself up for a major meltdown when my watery pee can only produce a faint positive. Stupid, stupid girl.
I hastily stuck the pee stick up my sleeve and rushed back to my office where I shoved it in my desk drawer, determined not to look at it. 10 minutes later I caved and opened the drawer and what do I see? Two beautiful dark pink lines.
When will I be confident in this? I can’t help but worry that seeing a heartbeat at 6 weeks won’t do anything to curb this ridiculous behavior. Any tips? I want to enjoy 100% of this time, instead I’m shoving pee-soaked sticks up the sleeve of my Nordstroms sweater!