Why on earth are the secretaries at OB and midwife clinics so rude? Seriously, y’all! I would expect a tiny bit of personality from whomever I hired to answer my phones and book appointments.
I have set up two appointments for next week, each at a different midwife clinic. The first is at a clinic at Central Baptist hospital which is a 60 second drive and a 5 minute walk from my front door. So. Convenient. This clinic has traditional OBGYNs and “modern midwives” available. I booked with the older of the three midwives. The receptionist, however, was incredibly rude and it left me with this nagging feeling in the pit of my stomach that this might not be the place to expect continued tender loving care.
This morning I booked a consultation with another midwife in town who delivers at a hospital about 15 minutes away – not far but with Lexington traffic it could easily take 30 minutes to get there. Again I was greeted by a harsh receptionist who was not at all kind and gentle. I was told that until I’m certain I’ll be transferring to her clinic I can only have a 15 minute consultation. I understand this, but the way the information was delivered left me feeling pressured and like I was being a bother.
Each receptionist also seemed very put-off when I was unsure what kind of appointment I’m booking. I politely pointed out that this is the first time I’ve made it this far in a pregnancy and that I’m in uncharted territory. I also mentioned my prior loss and two years of infertility and received no additional guidance.
I have seen three OBs in Lexington prior to starting infertility treatment and every single one left me in tears of frustration when they refused to listen to concerns over my progressively more absent cycle. No one offered to run blood tests. No one did an ultrasound. No one did anything to see what might actually be wrong. They just sent me home with a new birth control prescription. I will not return to these clinics for my OB care now that I have a $20,000 baby in my womb.*
Several people have said that I am too picky when it comes to my medical care, but I beg to differ. I was less picky before and found myself in situations where I received sub-par care or, worse, had conditions completely overlooked. I have learned throughout infertility and autoimmune disease that having the RIGHT doctor can make all the difference. I have also learned that it is incredibly important FOR ME to have a clinician who listens to my concerns and then alleviates them by talking to me like the educated human being I am. I expect nothing less than this from my OB or midwife. Picky? Maybe. Necessary for my sanity and safety? ABSOLUTELY.
Any advice on how to find a good OB or midwife? Any sample list of questions I might want to ask during my first appointment? I already have a long one going but am always looking for more input.
* That’s right – $20k. I hate that number. I had less in college loans from my four-year degree. At least my degree with stay with me forever. There is no promise that this little Chicken will be here forever.