Hey y’all! I missed yesterday’s post due to some work travel but I’m back today and ready to dazzle you with some VERY exciting topics 😉
My nose might be starting to calm down, and the rash on my belly is finally starting to clear up. I’m still unbelievably snotty but the pain in my face has gone away, making me think I might be healing? Hopefully this is not the calm before another painful snot storm. I see Dr. Shannon this afternoon at 4:30 and I’ll ask if there is anything she wants me to be taking. I suspect I’ll get more “tough it out” from her too, though.
According to the Professor I was mouth breathing all night… and making tons of not at all sexy sounds. He was so sweet and did an impression. I was humiliated. Dammit you guys, why does pregnancy make us so gross? I want to be his radiant, glowing vessel of life. Not his snotty, farting, mouth breathing whale of a wife! Oh well. Maybe we’ll have sex again in 2014.
I’m still planning on going to the beach tomorrow, sinuses be damned. Two nights ago I dug out my swim suits and tried them all on. I deemed two bikini’s to be borderline acceptable, meaning they did not show too much cellulitic butt cheek nor did they pinch my new hip chub. I’m still on the fence if the bump looks pregnant when bare. When I see certain angles of myself in passing I’m all “Whooooo! Look at that preggo!” But in the comfort of my own home the bump still looks a little more like a lump. Lump or bump, I”m not letting a little butt cellulite and questionable belly detour me from basking in some delightful Florida sun!
One thing I noticed when trying on swim suits was the current state of my hair. First we have the hair on my head, which is more lush than it has ever been. I’m absolutely in love with pregnancy head hair! Then we have this pale fur that has spouted all over my belly that is both lush and disgusting. If I weren’t such a chicken I might wax it before going to the beach but something about hot wax on my baby lump seems… dangerous. And finally, we have the hair on my nether regions which is, um, also lush? I’m sure this is TMI but wow, things are crazy down there and not tucking neatly away into my swim bottoms meaning some serious landscaping is in order. BUT, and there is always a but, it is kinda hard to get down there right now with this Chicken Lump/Bump. It’s going to take some smoke and mirrors to get things cleaned up tomorrow before we hop on the plane.
And finally, self tanner. Usually before I go to the beach I spend a few weekends laying out to get a base tan so my extremely pasty body does not burn to a crisp or scare anyone. During pregnancy, however, I’m really hesitant to expose any portion of my self to the sun without first slathering on SPF 100,000,000. Not only has pregnancy graced my body with extra hair (everywhere) it has also covered me with all these red spider veins. I already had quite a few from sun damage as a kid and teen and I’m not eager to add even more. After lots of research and a few chats with various sales associates at Sephora I purchased my first bottle of sunless tanner! I’m SUPER excited to try this stuff out! The associate showed me how to use it and it seems pretty fool-proof and, honestly, even if I do end up an orange streaky mess it won’t matter a whole lot because, hello I’m hairy, have butt and thigh cellulite and am sporting a big baby belly. A little orange streaking would only add some much needed comedic relief! 🙂
A quick update on Operation S.O.S. (Sell Our Shit): We have sold $511 in shit so far. I’m proud of our progress and will be even more proud after the first garage sale and I can reclaim some space in the house!
Currently we have this china set listed on Craigslist. I sure hope someone gives it a home. It’s pretty and stuff, but not my style. I am also death to dishware and really am better off with Ikea and Corelle!
Filed under Pregnancy.