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Blog Survey Responses!

06/16/2014

Belle

I’m done with school and FINALLY getting around to sorting through all your awesome responses from the Scrambled Eggs Blog Survey! I had the survey open for one week and 150 of you all took the time to respond. Thank you so much! Your feedback was extremely helpful and will help shape Scrambled Eggs in the coming weeks and months. Let’s look at the responses:

First, who are you?

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Turns out more of you are blog readers than blog writers, which surprised and delighted me! I’m glad to see that people outside of the blogging world are coming to read blogs. Sometimes I feel like we are all just yammering on to one another and no one outside of the community is listening… I guess I’m wrong!

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The vast majority of my readership are parenting after infertility or parenting but not after infertility. A total of 16% of you are actively undergoing infertility treatments and the remaining 8% is either neither parenting, undergoing treatment, or pursuing adoption. I’m surprised at how many of my readers are parenting after infertility. For the few of you still in the trenches, this should give you so much hope!

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The vast majority of us are between 30 and 40 years of age, which makes sense when you consider where we are in our lives. There are also a few youngin’s which surprised me, too!

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147 of respondents are female, 1 is male (Hi! If you are IVF Male shoot me a message. I’ve been thinking about you guys and wondering how your story has panned out!), 1 preferred not to share and 1 skipped this question all together. That is a lot of estrogen, ladies! Especially when you consider all the Vivelle dots and little blue estrogen pills we have taken or are taking!

And then the questions transition into Scrambled Eggs content.

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Posting Frequency: As a busy mom to a VERY high energy kiddo I was not sure where to start with a posting schedule. This helps tremendously! There was a pretty even split between 3-4 posts a week and 1-2 posts a week. I am tired of stretching myself too thin and posting erratically so I am going to try and commit to posting a written entry twice a week and one “Wordless Wednesday” photo post. I think this is an attainable goal and will hopefully keep you all entertained but not bombarded with Belle, Bean and Cats. To the 15% who would like to see posts 5 or more times a week… I am FLATTERED but am seriously having a hard time keeping myself showered and my kid out of the liter box so daily posts may be a while off still! 🙂

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Blog content was also interesting. I am not a big fan of how Poll Daddy organized these results but can’t complain because the service is free! According to this break down, the vast majority of you are interested in parenting posts. I wish I had probed a little more deeply into this one. If you ranked parenting as one of your top two choices, would you mind sharing what kind of parenting posts in the comments below? Do you want to read about the challenges we encounter as new parents? Or maybe the triumphs? Or both perhaps? Do you want to see silly posts about the gross realities of motherhood? Like cat box nibbles and when your kid takes an O out of her mouth and inserts it into YOUR nose? (Disgusting, by the way.)

The next most important topic to my readers are slice of life posts. I can agree with this one. I love reading blogs that give me little peeks into your lives. I find a lot of inspiration in seeing how other Mom’s enrich the lives of their children without spending a gazillion dollars on fancy classes, too.

Infertility trended as the 3 most desired category. I’m pleased to see this make the top three and am happy to include content on infertility in the future. I have been surprised by how much infertility has shaped who I am. I had hoped, perhaps naively, that bringing home a baby would erase the past few years. It did not. The aches of treatment, loss and the deep, soul crushing desire for a child that I could not physically produce is still a very real, very alive part of my soul. To omit this topic from future posts is to be untrue to my readers and that has NEVER been my motto.

Coming in at 4, 5 and 6 are crafting and housekeeping posts, cooking posts and then (sadly) cat posts. Poor cats! 🙂 Lucky for you, I don’t have a whole lot of time to craft, cook, and photograph cats these days so everyone should be pretty happy with my very sporadic “other” posts!

Question No. 7 was an opened-ended question about specific posts you would like to see. Quite a few of you are interested in my life in NYC. These will be fun because now that Sabine is a little older and the brutal winter is over we have some super exciting plans! There were also quite a few requests for relationship posts and lord have mercy, I could fill weeks on this topic. Sadly, romance after infertility, pregnancy and then 9 months of sleep deprivation is, um, lacking. We’ll talk more about this soon!

Several of you also dug my cleaning posts and would like to see more on that and living in a small space. I’m working on a series of posts all about this, actually, that I think you will all enjoy. Complete with photos of my drawers and cabinets – the good, the bad and the really disorganized!

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As for pictures – you love them! Lucky for you, I love taking them and NEED a good reason to haul my camera out more often. To the folks who are not interested in seeing daily photos of Sabine, don’t worry. The camera is a pain to lug out so pictures of her won’t be bombarding your feed daily. If you DO want daily Sabine bombardment, though, you can follow my Sabine Daily blog, which is a little more like Sabine A-Few-Times-A-Weekly, but who is judging?!

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Your post length answers made me happy. 500-750 word long posts are easy for me to manage. 1000+ word posts at this point might not be so feasible. That said, I am known for my long-windedness so I can pretty much guarantee that you will still see the occasional post that is so long your eyes start to cross and you need to adjust the brightness on your screen.

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So why do you read blogs? The most of you read to connect with people going through similar life changes. I’m surprised by this. I thought most of you would fall into the “learning more about…” category. The fact that most of you are looking to connect made me open the email account I have attached to this blog and CRAP you have been emailing me! A lot! And I am not responding! Which is terrible. I’m updating my “Contact” information to send your messages to my main email account so that I do not miss important messages anymore. There was one email from when Sabine was BORN about a new mama who came across the exact book where I got my daughters name from, and her new son was coincidently named Griffin who is also a character from this book! What an awesome connection and such a bummer I missed this message MONTHS ago! So email is updated and I vow to connect with you better from here on out.

Question No. 11 was asking you to share your blog address. Most of you are familiar faces but some are new. I am excited to poke around your blogs this week!

And finally, Question No. 12 was full of extremely kind, and tear-producing messages. I love that I have helped, and continue to help, so many women. I love even more that you come to my blog still. And I love the most that some readers read specifically to learn how to support their friends and loved ones who are going through treatment. And now I’m getting all sappy feeling – you guys made my day!

And then there is one little feedback that I need to address – one reader said she felt I have lost touch with my infertile roots and I spend too many posts complaining about the challenges of parenting. This was a big wake-up. I have written a lot about sleep and how stressful our journey was, you are right. Now that I am able to get a regular 7 hour a night sleep I’m feeling much more human and need to spend more time focusing on the GIFT I have received. Sabine is an incredible little human and I promise to do a better job documenting our good times and less time spent dwelling on the hard. Thank you for bringing this to light!

Ok, this was a long one. I think I exceeded the 500-750 word request 🙂 Consider it makeup for the last few weeks of no posts due to school! Now I’m off to shower and get my little family ready for our Father’s Day celebration. To all of you who responded, thank you. To those who did not, feel free to reach out via comments or email if you ever have any input!

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7 Comments

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  1. APE #
    June 16, 2014

    Great post! I feel compelled to make a comment about the “one little feedback” you received saying that you complain too much. Listen, I am an infertile who was blessed with the most amazing little boy. I have been pregnant five times and he is my only living child, so believe me when I say, I know what a miracle he is and I feel so grateful to have him. BUT – that doesn’t mean that I can’t complain because I shouldn’t since it was so hard to conceive him. I wouldn’t like it if someone made me feel ungrateful because I need to vent once in awhile. It’s just one more thing that fertile people have over us infertiles because that is not something they ever have to worry about. My son is a blessing and I love him, but he is also a little $hit sometimes (he is now 4), and sometimes it is really hard to not get frustrated, especially when you are getting no sleep or can’t get any time for yourself because your kid won’t get off your boob. This is your blog and if you need to vent, I am here for you, and it helps me feel so not alone. I want to hear that there are other experiences like mine. That is why I read your blog. So, keep it real Belle! Put the good in with the bad. I want to read it so I feel like I am somewhat normal! 🙂

    • June 16, 2014

      Ditto! I get where that reader was coming from but just because you have struggled to have your baby doesn’t mean you are being ungrateful or somehow exempt from being aloud to voice a “complaint”. Just my 2 cents. And I certainly speak from experience as a long time infertile turned mommy yet still infertile.

  2. June 16, 2014

    Well somehow I missed this poll! LOVE the idea though – I’ve been struggling on what to write and how to shape my blog too, do you mind if I also use this idea?

  3. June 16, 2014

    This is a great post but I need to say something. if ONE person out of 150 respondants said that she felt you had lost touch with your infertility roots, I would say that it is good to be sensitive, but recognize that means that 149 people do not feel that way (over 99%). Please do not feel guilt about the things you choose to post about. Parenting is hard enough, these are real challenges, and you can combine them with the guilt of feeling like you should be grateful for everything, which is another pressure to put on you! That doesn’t mean you aren’t grateful, we all know you are!

  4. June 16, 2014

    I echo the other comments about the ONE feedback. I am parenting after infertility and I certainly love my little miracle wholeheartedly BUT I am still parenting and damn it’s hard some days. No matter how you became a parent (naturally, IVF, adoption, step parent etc. etc.) it is a challenge
    and some times you need to talk/vent/post about the challenges to help you get through them and
    to help others who are experiencing the same challenges. I know I was reading other blogs from people who were dealing with colicky babies when I was in the thick of it looking for pointers on how to cope and also to know I was
    not alone. It was truly helpful to know that the way I was feeling at the time was not unusual at all. I am certain your posts about sleep challenges, constant nursing, bottle refusal and the like have helped many many readers. Please don’t stop posting about your challenges whether it’s a vent/complain or just information 🙂

  5. June 17, 2014

    I have never felt that you’ve forgotten your infertile roots. There’s a big difference between talking about the challenges of parenting and having absolutely nothing good to say about your child or being a parent. The latter I would definitely have issue with (and have seen it happen on other blogs), but it’s always very obvious to me how much you cherish and love your little girl, even through all the challenges. Infertile or not, none of us who go on to parent can ever escape sleep deprivation (which is hard, hard, hard to go through – there’s a reason it’s used as a method of torture!) or feeling completely overwhelmed. Please don’t ever feel that you need to apologize for being honest. 🙂

  6. June 17, 2014

    I’m finding parenting after infertility harder than non infertile parenting simply because your so aware of the enormity of this blessing and have the very real possibility of not having anymore children that you can sometimes over compensate compared to other parents.Then there is the huge guilt you feel for complaining about very real and normal parenting problems but it’s almost as if your not allowing to complain because you struggled so hard to have a baby and are now “being ungrateful”. I have had some pretty nasty comments and have found the best thing is to just ignore them and carry on doing the best I can. Just because you went through infertility doesn’t mean your not just as tired and frustrated dealing with your newborn and all mothers complain!

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